There are many times when Faythe is found guilty of doing something, I notice she likes to avoid eye contact with us. I don’t know why? Probably that’s a sign of guilt…Mommies out there any idea?
The scrap is exactly how she looks when she’s guilty of doing something but refuse to admit. As she reaches her terrible 2 peak (I hope it will subside soon)…she’s at the peak of doing the things which you don’t want her to do, and yet after doing that, she gives me that guilty look and just keeping quiet don’t want to admit or say anything.
What is the best way to make them admit and not to interrogate them? I’m still trying to figure out how to do that professionally. As I don’t want my child to grow up doing the wrong things and dare not admitting their mistakes. At the same time I don’t want them to turn into finger pointing situation where they blame other people for their own wrong doing.
My current approach would be to ask her nicely, who did it..and eventually she’d admit, and I’d tell her that it’s OK to admit and make mistakes…but you have to admit and don’t blame on other people (e.g. maid, Vyktore) and I won’t scold you if you admit that’s you as I know they are still growing and learning. But I am not sure if she understand the importance of taking the blame vs passing the blame and how it could affect our attitude as we grow.
Now it makes me wonder, when will they actually understand. Well, of course I’m not into the lying stage…yet!!!
Any great tips from the Parents Blogger?
haha….look at her face, so funny la….
I think it’s important to stress that you will not be angry if she admits it, but will be if she doesn’t. Then she won’t be so scared……
Maybe she scare you scold her. Why don’t bring her to somewhere private and have a talk and assure her that it is ok to let you know what happen…
At least you can spot her making mistake. Lately my hubby just introduce the word “punishment”. I am suprised that my children understands what they are.
she look scared at her face and scared to have eye contact with u. need to slowly talk to them about ” mistake” and learn to be confess.
Dunno – read the SuperNanny book?
aiyoo ellisa also won’t say that she did it la!! no matter how hard i korek, my one is one hard nut to crack.
it’s natural self-defense.
ah when u find the answer share share k.
So far, both my gals always admit what they did, so I hv no probs. When they admit that they’d done something wrong, I’d sternly tell them not to do it again and tell them the consequences of their actions.
i’ll be doing what u are doing. re-inforce the message everytime, and hope she’ll eventually get it.
instead of using negativity, praise her everytime for admitting her mistakes, but of course, if u have ‘punishment’, do follow up with your words. make sure she knows for every action there is a consequence to it. ‘gah yau!’
then hor…. u are tagged 😛
http://sweetpeamy.blogspot.com/2007/09/5-things-wor.html
Hello…Very NICE new home. Sorry eh, so long never pay a visit to ur home.
My boy knows how to lie now ler. He would do something minor like “kakak, papa call you.” Of coz the father didn’t call, he wanted the kakak to go away, that’s why he did it.
ashley also gives me that look ;D thanks for sharing on how you deal with this 😀
hehhe i know that look. denisha used to lie and blame darien for her wrong-doing … i scolded her initially but it doesn’t work. so i decided to reward her instead … everytime she doesn’t blame her brother i buy her something she like .. i too made sure that its not expensive la … imagine buying until its endless … burn a hole in our pocket. haha. i’m glad it works well .. now she’ll say “mommy don’t scold ok .. sorry mommy it’s me.” works well try it … kids love rewards.
thks for burning the cd .. i bet ur photography skills r really great. No need to mail to me .. mayb i can meet u up for a tea and chat .. that day oso didn’t chat much … too many ppl. gimme a buzz or email when u r available .. i’ll be around until end of the month.
XY’s a funny girl. Sometimes, she’ll come and admit w/o us asking her. Other times, she’ll deny (hmm.. but she doesn’t really blame others). And like u, I’ll ask till she admits. Then will follow up with punishment (depending on the severity of the mistake) since she din admit in the 1st place. I don’t know at wat age they’ll understand but with their super short (and selective) memory, we’ve gotta repeat it many many times… and hope they’ll eventually get it… someday. 😀
oh… thanks for sharing great tips here… I think to remind them often will eventually make them understand. En En is 15 months and if she did something wrong but when we asked, who did that? She will looked at us and her finger pointing to herself… how can you punish her?? Other times, she will ignore you and pretend none of her business. But still we got to tell her this is not right, cannot do this next time.